R U Ok?

R U OK? DAY   Thursday 12th September 2019

 

It is not just a phrase; it is a really important question.

 

We greet people every day and ask a variation of “How are you?”  “How’s it going?”  “How ya doin?”  Often people answer with “Fine thanks.”  “Good thanks.”  “Okay.” Or something similar.  We ask the question without really expecting a deep and meaningful answer.  And those we ask, answer the question with what they think we want to hear.

I can’t tell you how many times people have said “Well of course I say I’m okay – no one really gives a damn anyway – and they certainly don’t want to hear about all my problems.”  This is a huge part of the problem.  People who really need to talk to someone, don’t feel that they can because they don’t honestly believe that anyone really cares anyway.

On this R U OK? Day take a moment, and ask a co-worker or friend if they are ok and then, be an active participant in the conversation.  If you’ve noticed that someone is a little more quiet than usual, or that they seem a little down, check in with them and see how they are doing.  Without being really pushy, don’t accept the standard “Oh I’m fine thanks” answer when you can clearly see that they are not.  Say something like “I’ve noticed you seem quieter than usual, so I’m wondering if you really are ok?”  If they still say that they are fine, that’s okay.  Just let them know that if they ever need someone to talk to you are there for them.  They may not be ready to talk about their problems yet, but at least they know that you are open to hearing from them, should they need someone to talk with.

Sometimes just knowing that someone is willing to take the time to ask how we are doing is all the encouragement we need to keep moving forward when things get tough.

 

Written By Kathrine Carton B.Coun

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