Friends ~ True Friends

I overheard a conversation between two young ladies this past week.  At a guess, I would put them, age wise, in their early 20’s.  The conversations went along the lines of:-

Lady 1)  Oh I meant to tell you I’ve got over 400 Friends on Facebook now.

Lady 2)  Aww you’re so lucky, I’ve only just reached 170 Friends.

This got me thinking about the topic of friends.   What really constitutes a “friend”?  Is it simply someone who “likes” your posts on social media or puts a happy face emoji and a LOL in a comment?  Or is it someone you can count on to be there for you when the proverbial poop hits the fan, so to speak?

I almost wish there was another name for “friends” on social media because I don’t think “friends” is really the right word.  True these people are not necessarily acquaintances either as we may have been interacting with them on various platforms for years.  I have “friends” that I first got to know on message boards at least 20 years ago and I still interact with them today on facebook.  However, this still doesn’t put them in the true “friend” category.

It is a sad reflection on today’s society that people are impressed by the amount of “friends” they have on social media.  But can I just question out of those 100 plus “friends” most people have on their facebook account, how many would be running to their door with food and a shoulder to cry on if say their partner died?  Or what if you were diagnosed with some horrible disease?  How many people on your friends list would be there to support you, drive you to Dr’s appointments, mind your kids etc.?

I have 159 “friends on my personal facebook account, and let me tell you excluding family; I have exactly 4 true friends that I know would be there to support me no matter what happened.  People who would drop everything to be there for me, and people for whom, I would drop everything to be there for them.  These are ladies I have known individually for between 38 and 45 years.  We have seen each other through boyfriends, marriages, divorces, pregnancies, child birth, child rearing (Yes the terrible two’s almost killed us, little did we know that was just a taste test for the teenage years) the death of parents and in one case the sudden death of a spouse.

Whilst when times were tough, many of my other 155 facebook friends sent good wishes, prayers, cute emojis and the like, which was all very nice and may I say appreciated.  However, when it came to the crunch there were really only 4 friends I knew I could count on for concrete support.

My “take home” message from all of this is:-  Appreciate the genuine friends you have in your life.  Make time for them; don’t let their friendship slip through your fingers.  Whilst it is nice to think we are all popular with our hundreds of “friends” on social media.  Just remember most people would be lucky to be able to count their true friends on the fingers of one hand.   We don’t need 100 friends, what we really need are a few good ones that we know we can depend on and who really care enough to put themselves out for us when times are tough.

 

Written By Kathrine Carton   B.Coun.

 

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